Breaking the Cycle of Self-Doubt and Regret: A Proven Strategy to Unlock Your Potential and Achieve Your Goals
I recently found myself stuck in a rut and wondered how I could dig myself out of this hole. The thought of how much effort it would require was overpowering and, to be frank, quite depressing. While doing a quiet self-reflection a few months back, I realized that I am doomed unless I take back control of my life.
So how does one break this vicious cycle of self-doubt and regret?
The key to unlocking our potential and achieving our goals starts with radical honesty, at least with ourselves. It is not about telling the truth or even earning an honest living. It is much more fundamental than that. It is about analyzing our monologues and asking ourselves if we are honest with ourselves. And only then can you realize what is working, what isn’t working, what we lack, and how we can get it.
“What you resist, persists.” — Carl Jung.
One of the most effective ways to take control of our lives and break free from these cycles is to write down our goals and desires in as exact a term as we understand them. This list is not for public consumption but for us to gain clarity about the jumbled mess of thoughts inside our heads. Writing down helps us untangle our thoughts and gives a realistic picture of where we are and where we would want to be. This may seem counterintuitive, but by shifting our focus away from ourselves and onto a piece of paper, we can take a step back and gain a new perspective.
Once we have written down our goals, the next step is to create a list of actions to help us achieve them. Goals give us a destination to head towards, and a list of actions are steps we take in that direction. One of the most important things to understand is that this list of actions needs to chart only part of the way to the goal. What we need most is the next action that would take us a small step closer to our destination. And that is enough! And we repeat the process once we have successfully completed the action.
Of course, taking action toward our goals will come with its own set of challenges. These obstacles can be navigated or avoided by focusing on our values and understanding our abilities and resources. This is where Bruce Lee’s famous quote, “be as water, my friend,” comes in handy. When a river encounters a mountain, it doesn’t try to go over it. It molds itself to the shape of the mountain and goes around it. (I know this is just one of the interpretations, but it is apt.) It’s important to remember that the focus should be on taking action and that our values will surface by themselves.
“It always seems impossible until it’s done.” — Nelson Mandela.
Summary
- Breaking free from the cycle of self-doubt and regret starts with radical honesty and taking control of our lives.
- By writing down our goals and creating a list of actions to achieve them, we can shift our focus away from ourselves and onto a clear path forward.
- Remember, it’s time for action, not dwelling on negative thoughts.
- Books that can help you on this journey
- Getting Things Done by David Allen
- The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Steven R Covey
